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5 Funniest Penis Enlargement Methods

5 Funniest Penis Enlargement Methods
Written by James

You can’t blame someone for wanting a bigger penis.

For so long, men have looked for ways to increase the size of their penis. Some have really good ideas that never transcended well into reality.  Most of the time, it ends in a nasty disaster. Some techniques we’ve seen are not even in the realm of reason. All of the efforts towards penis enlargement are all for one thing – to impress the ladies.

What’s the BIG deal? 

Men believe that a bigger penis would satisfy the ladies more during sex. The statistics agree that women generally prefer a bigger penis than 5 inches. This is extremely important since there’s a huge percentage of  men with penises smaller than 5 inches. That’s why it drives men to look for ways to increase the size of their penis, and it doesn’t always end up great.

Here are 5 of the funniest penis enlargement methods:

    1. Stretching

Just the name of this technique could make any man squirm. Some believe that by stretching your flaccid penis regularly would make it longer and harder when erect. Not only does this technique sound really painful, it doesn’t have any real benefits. Stretching your penis does not affect the length of your penis, regardless if you do it regularly. All you will have is a really sore penis and zero erections.

    1. Clamping

If the first one didn’t make you feel nauseous, maybe this one will. Clamping is a very dangerous method that many believe works to increase the size of your penis. The idea is to clamp the bottom part of the penis when erect to restrict blood flow from going back, therefore trapping it in the penis. Not only is this technique very dangerous, it could leave your love muscle permanently damaged. People have actually invented “cock rings” for this method, and it can make things worse if it gets stuck and the only way to have it removed is to saw the ring off, or to amputate your penis entirely. Yikes.

    1. Penis Pumps

One of the more known penis enlargement devices, the penis pump is a cylinder that is fitted over the penis to create a partial vacuum to push more blood into the penis. The idea is farfetched, and the only thing you’d get out of this is a bloodshot, extremely inflamed penis. The partial vacuum will not push blood into your penis; it pushes the blood from your skin outside. Some reports say that penis pumps have caused significant damage to the shaft of the penis, especially to the skin, making it inflamed and extremely sensitive due to the inflammation.

    1. Penis enlargement surgery

A surgical option to enlarge the penis is costly and crazy considering that you have other natural options to choose from. There are several options in surgery, which includes a dermal implant, and by moving fat cells from other parts of your body to the penis. This may increase size, but its outcome would only make your penis look out of proportion; not to mention that surgical techniques could also lessen the sensation in your penis. Penis enlargement surgery can cost anywhere from $4000 to the upwards of $17000.

    1. Jelqing

Jelqing has its roots from milking the cow. The idea is to push blood to the tip of your penis in order to make it larger. The idea on paper seems to work, since this is the mechanism that penis enlargement supplements base on, but jelqing is simply ineffective. In order to influence blood flow, the change needs to start from the blood vessels, not from an outside force that traps blood.  All you would get from jelqing is a really inflamed penis with no improvement in size. I’ve written a whole article about Jelqing check it out here

There are a number of proven ways to increase your penis. The most effective so far is the use of male enhancement supplements. Supplements like Formula 41 Extreme contain ingredients that dilate the blood vessels in order to push more blood to your penis. If you’re looking for the best male enhancement supplements, you can check out our library of male enhancement reviews to help you decide which ones to buy.

About the author



33, Regular gym dude. Frequently offers advice for gym bros.

Supplement expertise: Fat burners, muscle enhancement, male enhancement

James has struggled to stay fit all his life. At 24, he made the commitment to gain muscle mass through proper nutrition and exercise. He has first-hand knowledge in many supplements offered in the market today. Due to his commitment to fitness, he was able to build the body that he wants. He now frequents the gym to maintain the body that he worked hard for. His wild ride to success prompted James to provide useful advice to gym rats and neophytes alike.

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